


Forwards Backwards

by throed (11dishwashers)



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Childhood Friends, Dropped - Freeform, M/M, Road Trips, underground rapper! taeyong, wont be updated
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2016-12-26
Packaged: 2018-09-11 16:18:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8997937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/11dishwashers/pseuds/throed
Summary: Underground rapper Lee Taeyong has the most boring life imaginable until he bumps into his seperated childhood bestfriend at the supermarket. Suddenly Taeyong's thrust into a three day road trip full of heavy drinking, starwatching and feelings.





	1. Chapter 1

  
  


Lee Taeyong hated idols among other things.

He hated them to such an extreme that he could barely stand the taste of the word on his tongue, to the degree where he hadn’t even written a single verse on them which is what he always did with things he hated.

He didn’t keep up with any of the news and he didn’t care how much his sister annoyed him, there was no way he was going to watch the new EXO music video teaser.

 

Well, what did underground rapper Lee Taeyong do on weekends if not stew in his hate for the idol world?

His life wasn’t all that glamorous. He was aware of the people pirating his music, he still had a decent amount of cash and no matter how much he talked his life up on the mic the truth of the matter was that he was kind of lost in his bedroom every weekend.

He says lost because what other word would you use? Very infrequently he picked up a pen and wrote what came to his head. Even more infrequently he met up with his friends, and even  _ more  _ infrequently than all that he left his bed.

Your life could be called boring if cleaning your room was considered a treat. Taeyong always loved that; disinfectants, mops, rubber gloves, but his room was never dirty enough to actually clean and he wasn’t about to fuck it up on purpose. He couldn’t stand the white walls, even though white was his second favourite colour. The whole thing felt a bit clinical and his sister had brought him posters one day to liven up the place.

Taeyong hadn’t bought picture frames yet and he didn’t want to put them up bare because, you know, it would look just a bit thrown together.

  
  
  


“This is going to sound weird but-” Taeyong started, and Jaehyun knew the rest.

“Say no more, say no more. I get it, it’s fine,” Jaehyun replied.

Taeyong nodded and went through the stack of dvds on Jaehyun’s coffee table, alphabetizing them. It was dumb but at least he could hug Jaehyun.

His mother wasn’t so lucky, she was scared of germs through human contact and you could only imagine how that felt.

“Now I was thinking of getting pizza unless you wanna order something else?” said Jaehyun, finger hovering over the speed dial for Pizza Hut.

“That sounds great actually,” Taeyong had just finished restacking the dvds and wow, it looked so much better. Sometimes he thought it was funny how he acted so tough in his songs but really his life was nothing to brag about and his aversion to randomly sorted things was too strong for any normal human.

  
  
  


The critics had eaten it up like they could relate. It got nothing less than an 8 out of 10 within the first two months of release, he had a small following, all that good shit. 

Taeyong had put so much work into it, and here it was, in his own two hands; a copy of his first album.

The album art was his favourite- black, red and white only, thin lines that spelled out ‘ _ NEO’. _

His sister had jokingly accused him of copying that stupid NCT 127 group, apparently their name was ‘Neo Cultural Technology’. Well, that had nothing to do with it in complete honesty. It was called NEO because he wanted a change, he wanted something new so bad and as he looked at the shiny plastic cover he felt himself latch onto it. With this, he could turn things around and he could leave things behind.

  
  


Well, that was a year before Taeyong sat in Jaehyun’s sitting room eating slice after slice of pizza and shrieking at that stupid horror movie whenever the monster came on screen and nothing was different, except for the pressure and his reputation and the amount of invites he got for shows that he had to turn down.

  
  


Life was boring, oh my gosh.

  
  
  
  


Taeyong left his room once at the weekend, and rather frantically too. He’d ran out of Febreze cans and that was not a laughing matter despite how much Doyoung teased him for it.

He took one look out onto the winter scene beyond his window and threw his heavy black coat on.

Black was his favourite colour, all black, black on black, he’d wear nothing but it if he wasn’t accused of being a goth so much. 

He had winey red shoes and as far as he was concerned they were enough.

 

It might as well have snowed and gotten things over with instead of covering the pathways in skiddy ice that Taeyong had to steel himself when walking over.

He was always fond of snow anyway. It carried memories that were for the most part bittersweet, back to his childhood that he spent a fair bit away from Seoul where he lived now.

He wouldn’t mind it, he loved the colour of it too, and how it sparkled up orange under streetlights. Too bad his neighbours spread some salt around the front pathways and the atmosphere was nothing but damp.

  
  


The supermarket was a few blocks away and Taeyong had a special route around the buildings to get there.

He also had earphones but he reminded himself to keep it a bit quiet, he’s always been a bit more worried than he should be about going slowly deaf.

  
  


The lowpoint of the day happened pretty suddenly, he was just there minding his own business when he heard a man’s voice from behind him.

“That’s a lot of Febreze, isn’t it?” and a laugh. Now, Taeyong was always a patient person but he didn’t particularily feel like getting questioned on his weird habits today.

“What’s it to you?” he retorted, hand gripping around the shopping basket harder than necessary. He stayed facing the aisle, away from the man.

“Turn around,” the man said. What was this?

“Why should I?”

“Oh come on Taeyong, just turn around!”

Was it… was it a fan? Taeyong hasn’t been approached on the street too many times because of his music as he wasn’t completely popular and even less people actually knew his face but.

He turned around anyway, despite his mind’s protests.

 

Taeyong almost didn’t recognise him at first- after all, it had been years.

God he hated idols.

“It’s you!” said Nakamoto Yuta, hair dyed a wine colour since the last time they talked a good few years ago. He had one piercing in his right ear, a dangley steel earring in  _ only one  _ ear. How uneven- but Taeyong had to admit, it looked good.

Taeyong hated idols, but he sure as hell couldn’t hate Nakamoto Yuta, even after all this time.

“Yuta,” he said just a bit fondly. He was still more withdrawn than he should’ve been but it was a start.

“It’s been a while.”

Yuta nodded. “Too long, I think! We should do some catching up!”

  
  
  
  


They were both five years old in this small ass town on the outskirts of nowhere. It snowed constantly and consistently, it was all snow, always snow.  

Yuta lived across the street from him in the noisiest house. Everyone complained about it because they played their music too loud, and even Taeyong’s parents would tell him that the son was probably a delinquent too since his parents were so young. Looking back, it was completely stupid to say that just because of the music.

He had walked to school by himself, going the same route without fail. Every morning he’d leave at the same time as this scrawny boy with a head of curly brown hair.

“What’s your name?” he had shouted across the street one day.

“Yuta!”

“I’m Taeyong!”

And they were inseperable since.

They were inseperable, but they got seperated 10 years later.  

  
  
  
  


Six years after they parted, twelve minutes after they bumped into eachother at the supermarket, they made their way back to Taeyong’s house to catch up.

“Sorry about the place, I know how plain it is,” he said as they stepped in the door.

“It’s not plain,” Yuta lied. “I think it’s pretty.”

The kitchen wasn’t much to look at. It was built awkwardly in this weird shape, like an ‘L’ shaped tetris block.

The counters jutted out weirdly and the white tiles begged to be cleaned every time Taeyong cooked.

Too many things, hw always thought.

“Don’t take this the wrong way but your kitchen looks really weird,” said Yuta as he sat down at the small table by the sliding glass doors.  

“Yeah, I know… tea or coffee?”

“Coffee, three sugars.”

“So where have you been?” Taeyong asked even though he already knew. 

“Osaka,” Yuta replied. “I’m here for three more days since i have work.”

“Wait- you moved back to Japan?” 

“Yep! As soon as I went eighteen. I just needed a change, you know?”

Pretty drastic change- moving countries and all. 

“So why are you visiting?”

“Mark really wanted me to go to his rookie concert thing,” Yuta explained. “He’s pretty close to debuting and they had to do some show literally yesterday.”

Taeyong hated idols. He changed the subject.

“So where are you staying then?”

“Uh- I haven’t actually found a place yet, but I will!”

“You could… you could always stay here?”

A smile. “That sounds nice.”

  
  
  
  


As it turned out, they didn’t stay there.

“You’ve got three days left?” Taeyong asked.

He was lying on the sitting room sofa and Yuta has slumped against the coffee table, head tipped back and a beer bottle in hand.

Alcohol was a stupid fucking idea.

“Yep, three more days to go!” Yuta cheered, taking a swig of beer. “You’ve got a car, right?”

Taeyong frowned. “Obviously. Why though?”

  
  
  


You know what was a stupider idea than alcohol? This.

Taeyong was reversing out of his driveway since he was the more sober of the two. Yuta was cheering him on from the passenger seat, plugging his phone into the car radio to blast songs Taeyong couldn’t really concentrate on.

They had three days, three days to go to their childhood homes and back.

Three days for both ways, three days to drive more than a few hundred miles.

Three days.

Three days with Yuta.

Well, Taeyong had better make it count.

  
  



	2. Chapter 2

 

**Day One**

“Are you sober yet?”

Yuta just hummed. He was curled up in the passenger seat, back of his head shoved into the chair and his eyes were drooping closed from the exhaustion.

They’d gone a fair few miles in the fiveish hours that they’ve been driving.

It was still dark out, partly because they had left around 3 and partly because the sun rose late in winter.

Taeyong had his high beam on and a thermos of coffee in the cup holder by his side. He was teetering between sober and drunk, so close to being hungover and so close to almost drifting off the road.

“Pass me the coffee?”

Yuta picked the thermos up and unscrewed the cap.

“Open wide,” he said and Taeyong didn’t think much of it. Yuta poured the coffee straight into his mouth and Taeyong reminded himself to park as soon as they hit the closest freeway exit.

“Why were you in the supermarket?” asked Taeyong.

“What kind of a question is that? I needed 5 hour energy drink,” Yuta replied and Taeyong laughed, he missed Yuta.

Well obviously he missed Yuta, and obviously he missed Yuta enough to go on this road trip thing at 3 a.m to their childhood home without so much as turning to Jaehyun for advice.

(Jaehyun)

Had Jaehyun texted him? Probably.

“This was a terrible idea,” Taeyong laughed as his head hit the backseat. He was on the verge of death.

“How so?”

“I’m going to collapse at the wheel and get a ticket.”

“Oh well, don’t you miss the snow?”

He did.

  
  
  


The next exit came a handful of minutes later and Taeyong parked the car in this empty shopping center carpark.

They just sat there for a long time, it was nearing 8:30 and Taeyong had never properly watched the sun rise before.

“Turn off the music,” said Yuta who was now wearing both his coat and Taeyong’s one.

“Why?” and Taeyong risked a look at him. He looked like a baby bird, face half covered by the hood of his puffy jacket and eyes droopy. Cute.

“To hear the birds singing,” Yuta mumbled and Taeyong laughed at him.

“Alright, but you won’t hear them in the middle of this place,” he turned the volume to 0.

Sure enough the only sounds were the distant skidding of tires.

“Could you hear the birds in Osaka?”

“Have you  _ seen O _ saka?”

“Not exactly,” Taeyong said, fiddling with a loose thread on his sleeve. “What’s it like?”

And now they could see the sky lighting up shade by shade, from navy all the way to glorious pink.

Taeyong looked at Yuta again as he searched for words, and the sun hit his face, the seat, the car and everything was golden.

Absolutely gorgeous.

Taeyong couldn’t wait to see the snow like this.

“Osaka… its… its lively, for starters. I had a lot of fun but…”

Hesitant.

“But…?” Taeyong urged him on.

“Well, I missed you,” Yuta said, smile crooked and lit up like the rest of him. Taeyong was drowzy. He couldn’t think properly, that’s why he thought Yuta looked amazing.

“Hey, I missed you too,” he said. His cheeks were red but he was sober.

“I need to sleep though.”

“Alright alright, you sleep and I’ll make sure we don’t get attacked,” Yuta said, taking his phone out of his pocket.

Taeyong drifted off right there in the driver’s seat. Trust.

  
  
  


“H-how long was I out for?” he asked as he rubbed his eyes. He looked over to Yuta only to realise Yuta had fallen asleep too.

Taeyong checked his phone- 11 a.m. if they wanted to make it he’d have to leave pretty soon.

The shopping center was lit up with shop lights now, and several other cars were parked around it. Taeyong thought about getting them both some breakfast but he wasn’t about to leave Yuta in the car.

“Come on,” he nudged Yuta who let out a groan.

“Where are we going?” he asked, still 3/4s asleep.

“Lets get some breakfast.”

  
  
  


“Today we dine like kings,” Yuta said as he unwrapped his deli counter breakfast roll. Taeyong laughed again, it felt like he was laughing a lot around Yuta, but who wouldn’t?

“How much money did you bring?” he asked and Yuta looked up to the ceiling, tapping his chin.

“Uhhhh.... No idea to be honest, Mark can be  _ generous,  _ and he gave me quite a lot when I met up with him after the concert.”

Mark again. Taeyong knew his hate for idols was irrational, and his hate for Yuta’s stepbrother was especially unjustified.

He still didn’t hate Yuta for just up and leaving all those years ago, but Yuta was and always will be a special case for him.

“Don't you like… have a job?”

“Well, not really,” Taeyong sighed. “I’m a rapper but that doesn’t mean I actually  _ do  _ things. I haven’t really written anything since-”

“Since NEO?”

“Yeah- wait, you heard of it?”

What a stupid question.

“What a stupid question,” Yuta scoffed “Of course I’ve been following  your music career. Great job on the album, by the way.”

For some reason, this meant a lot coming from Yuta. Well Taeyong’s always admired Yuta, always cared about his opinion, and some things don’t change after even years…

 

Taeyong looked at Yuta, looked at his perfectly messy hair, his doe eyes, his wide smile. Some things do change.

  
  
  
  


They hit the road again and Taeyong felt especially suffocated.

He hadn’t changed his clothes since yesterday morning and it was fucking awful. He opened the window wide even though it was freezing out and Yuta didn’t protest, he just buried himself in his double layer of jackets even more.

  
  


The freeway was busy even though it was still arguably early (nearing 12:15 p.m) and they found themselves sitting in traffic quite a lot.

They played this stupid game whenever they had to stop.

“Pick a car colour," Yuta said, fiddling with his phone even though he was looking straight out at the cars ahead.

“Black,” Taeyong replied easily and Yuta sighed.

“The most common colour, all gone.”

“Well, what do you pick?”

“Silver, see who can find the most of their colour before we move again!”

(Taeyong won 12 cars to 8)

  
  
  


Yuta eventually switched into the drivers seat even though he almost certainly didn’t have a drivers license.

Taeyong was now able to sneak glances at Yuta more. He took advantage of the situation, looking a little too much at Yuta’s soft lips and Yuta’s soft hair and Yuta’s soft eyes

…

It was nothing. It didn’t mean anything.

  
  
  


They were getting closer and closer to rural areas as they strayed further from the cities clumped together in the middle. 

“Hold on, stop here,” Taeyong said as they were about to pass a gas station. 

“Sure,” Yuta turned into it.

It had been about 150 miles, 150 whole miles within the 10 hours they’d been on the road.

It was almost 5 by this point and the air was turning crisp as it got darker.

Taeyong filled up the gas and went into the station, Yuta following closely behind.

It was stark- almost empty aside from a european family and the cockeyed cashier (poor guy). The sound mostly came from the flickering fridges and the one busted bulb near the checkout.

“5 hour energy,” said Taeyong and Yuta nodded, going to pick up a few bottles from the fridge. Taeyong also bought a packet of mints for  _ reasons _ and they left.

  
  


They pulled in at a secluded carpark on one of those country trails that wasn’t a hopeless distance from their hometown, aka they could make it if they kept on course.

“Lets sit out,” Yuta said, and they both got it.

 

It was surrounded by trees for the most part- old pine trees that towered above the place. It could be dangerous but they were two dumb 21 year olds who ignored obvious shit like their own feelings.

Taeyong handed Yuta a bottle of 5 hour energy and opened the car door.

It was cold for 7 p.m, and it felt like much later, so really it made no sense why they sat on the car hood that faced out to the cliff road.

“This is so cheesy,” Yuta said, knees pulled up to his chest.

“Why do you say so?”

“Two childhood best friends bump into eachother after years of being apart and go on a roadtrip,” Yuta replied, all in one breath. He took a swig of his drink and Taeyong glanced at him because the moon lit up his face a little too well and his hair was highlighted white.

They were looking at the stars, or at the cliffs, something on the horizon- the stars were scattered weirdly but they stuck out against the completely dark sky and it was just nice.

“Blame drunk you,” Taeyong eventually said and Yuta laughed.

“I, for one, am glad we’re doing this,” he added.

“Yeah, I think I am too.”

In Taeyong’s opinion it was entirely too warm, too fuzzy, too fond.

  
  
  


Yuta fell asleep so he just about escaped having to drive and Taeyong picked him up and carefully set him down on the passenger seat. He climbed into the passenger seat instead and started the ignition, turning the car radio off so Yuta could get his rest.

…

Taeyong was completely aware of the growing pit in his stomach whenever he heard Yuta snore cutely or talk in his sleep, he was way too aware of what this pit in his stomach meant aswell.

There were words for it.

  
  
  


Almost 12 a.m and Taeyong wouldn’t be able to fall asleep even if he tried, he was thinking too much about the whole thing, about how Yuta was just what he was looking for, about how much he was looking for change and it seemed to appear out of nowhere and how he was falling all over again and it really wasn’t fair.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for not updating when i said :(( but here u guys go!! im like ,,,, halfway thru chapter 3 rn so idk expect it in a day or two since i'm busyish w xmas stuff?? (going to the funfair !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) its a lot meatier than this one but im sure ill manage to post it soon ! ^^  
> critique, as always, rly appreciated <3

**Author's Note:**

> i originally wanted to post this as a oneshot but i decided to make it chaptered since it follows the theme of a countdown on days so each day is one chapter !! (besides this one, this is a prologue of sorts)  
> dw though it'll be updated really frequently(the next two updates might even be uploaded today!!) since most of it is done  
> i love yutae oh my gosh it was a matter of time before i wrote this!! also critique is rly appreciated <333


End file.
